What I'm Looking For....

Okay, so I'm predicable in what I think about. ;-)

Some things are always at the forefront of my mind since that's simply who I am and who I chose to be. Still, this past year hasn't been easy. From the romantic wasteland of the early part of the year to getting my heart broken in spring and summer to the missteps of the past few months, I've faced more than a few challenges.

I already wrote a little bit about what I'm searching for in trying to find my ideal girl back in June. You can read that at http://zestyzach.blogspot.com/2007/06/to-care-to-accept-to-understand.html but I want to elaborate a little bit beyond that though.

Ultimately, I want to find someone who...

...I actually enjoy spending long periods of time with. When you can spend three, four or even five hours on the phone with a gal and not feel bored at all or desirous of doing something else, life is good. Moreover, when you find someone you can spend fifty or sixty hours with in person without either one of you getting bored or tired of the other, you've got something truly special there.

...loves Wikipedia, reading and the pursuit of pointless knowledge just like I do. It's an amazing world for trivia out there. If a gal knows who wrote with whom on the Monty Python BBC series, that's awesome. However, if she doesn't know but wants to find out, that’s even better. It always amazes me when people say they "don't care" or "aren't interested" in something. It's a fascinating world out there and I want someone who is curious about it.

...is intelligent. I've had a deep respect for the strong intelligence of every gal I've ever seriously dated. It's a make-it or break-it trait and (I hope) I would never date someone who I didn't consider to be very smart.

...isn't vain or obsessed with her appearance. So many women seem to focus so much of their energy on makeup and hair and clothing and all that other stuff that bores that hell out of me. I'm honestly just not that big a fan of makeup. Sorry.

...has a sense of humor. Despite appearances to the contrary, I'm really more silly than serious. I can't imagine being with someone who couldn't appreciate Bob Hope or Douglas Adams or the Marx Brothers. Also, if you can't laugh at yourself, then how much fun can you really be?

...is romantic. Romance, to me, is nothing more or less than the expression of our affection and feelings for the people we care for and love. There's an infinite number of ways to show it from grandiose to simple but if someone can't be bothered to do so, the person they're with will never know what the other feels for them, if anything.

...wants to travel and see the world. That's just a big part of who I am. Period. If a gal can't see herself wandering through the foothills of some snowy mountain range with minimal luxury or trying to decipher the menu at a vegetarian restaurant in some tiny town in Eastern Europe, she's probably not a good fit for me.

...understands and, ideally, shares my ethical principals.

...makes me and spending time with me as much of a priority as I do with her. It seems to me that a lot of people waste their lives chasing after money, overly consuming careers or some other pursuit of vanity or greed.

...kind and well-mannered. Civility and manners are a dying art.

...is faithful and trustworthy. Nobody's perfect but you shouldn't have to constantly have your heart hurting with concerns about whether or not she's on the verge of fooling around with someone else the minute you hit a rough spot.

...interesting. The cardinal sin in life is to be dull.


Phew! That’s one long and challenging list. There's probably a few things I could add to it but I think that's a great start.

For those who have asked me in the past, hopefully that explains a bit more about why I don't find myself in too many relationships.

I'd rather be alone than with someone who isn't right for me.

Advice For The Fairer Sex

"Find a guy who calls you beautiful instead of hot, who calls you back when you hang up on him, who will lie under the stars and listen to your heartbeat, or will stay awake just to watch you sleep... wait for the boy who kisses your forehead, who wants to show you off to the world when you are in sweats, who holds your hand in front of his friends, who thinks you're just as pretty without makeup on. One who is constantly reminding you of how much he cares and how lucky his is to have you. The one who turns to his friends and says, 'that's her.'"

- Found randomly on the web, 08/27/07

Elucidation

My life is lived in three worlds:

The first is my heart.
The second is my head.
The third is beyond.

I live primarily in the second.
I am distracted and obligated by the third.
I desire to live in the first.

Alma

La Vida del Sur [Mexico, Pt. 4]

The past few days have just flown by!

The still inexplicable complications mentioned at the end of my previous post put me off blogging momentarily and infrequent internet access did nothing to encourage my desire. Still, I couldn’t help but try to describe some sense of the past few days.

Remarkable as it is to look back on it, I’ve now been through eight of Mexico’s states since the trip began. Sweltering car rides, questionable cuisine and contentious conversations with the parents have all added up to one interesting vacation. The weather has occasionally proven a formidable adversary. Illuminating the skin in a dull heat that slowly reddens and stings at times while bursting the clouds to fall torrential downpours at others. In the long hours my mind wanders, rarely settling on the reality of the landscape around me. The momentary solace of focused thought is often broken by the odd occurrences that seem to color each day.

In this mood, I am grateful to have landed in Merida for a few days. To have something of a sense of even temporary permanence so sorely lacking from changing cities and residences on a daily basis is a wonderful thing. I will be lodging in the hotel here for the next four days and I am doing my best to live up to a more common and sensible idea of a holiday. Lazing by the poolside, drifting through the city streets, wishing I could flirt better in Spanish. Merida is a large city with significant diversions and I am eager to explore it further. Still, I am anxious to get home as well and embark on several new personal projects.

In five days, I have the comfort of my own bed. Until then, I intend to make the most of my time in Mexico.

El Sol & El Sudor [Mexico, Pt. 3]

Drip, drop,

drip drop.

That lovely feeling of perspiration exiting from every pore as you wonder if you’ve been keeping yourself sufficiently hydrated. Luckily, life has a built-in means of letting you know. If you haven’t had enough water and stay out in the sun too much, you’ll probably pass out. Isn’t life grand with its little hints?

If you’re ever considering traveling to Belize, I’d strongly recommend reconsidering. It’s not that the country itself is so bad but rather that there are so many more interesting places in the region to visit. Our little jaunt back to Belize started out with a sweet but short bus ride across the Mexican frontier with the locals. Having been to Belize City before, our destination this time was a small town only nine miles from the Mexican border called Corozal, the capitol of one of the country’s six districts. With a population of 33,353 people and a rather simple town layout, well... I hate to say this but there simply isn’t much there. Certainly, it’s true that if you look for it, you can find something interesting in any location you venture to. However, in this case it seems that our time would have been better spent in Chetumal as there were a few things here I would have preferred to have seen.

Corozal. We departed from the bus and promptly ventured out to find some food, preferably Chinese if you can believe it. Even in this small town, there were several restaurants run by either immigrants or descendants of immigrants from that lovely country. Our first entry into a suspiciously unsanitary looking restaurant quickly led us to our first... er, “out-ry.” sigh. Sometimes, I’m good with words. Sometimes, not so much. At any rate, we eventually settled on a moderately clean looking place with a forgettable name called… wait for it… sorry, I forgot. Haha. Good stuff. After a little confusion as to why we didn’t want meat on our plates, I was eventually served a charming plate of pinto beans, rice, fried plantains and mixed vegetables. I was also given a small lettuce and tomato salad I wouldn’t eat if you paid me. For those who have not traveled through less developed countries, avoid lettuce as best you can. Actually if you want some very interesting and, quite possibly, very graphic tales of time spent in the bathroom for your friends back home then go for it. The remainder of our time there is something of a blur. It was mostly just walking around and sweating. I did enjoy the opportunity to spend more time wearing my black cowboy hat that I would likely not have the guts to wear in Seattle. Pictures eventually, I promise. Let’s just say I’ve never been particularly well known for my great taste but I do kinda like the hat.

Chetumal. Having taken a different bus line back into town, we arrived at a different terminal and had the opportunity to briefly partake of that wonderful feeling of being lost. Eventually we got it sorted out and returned to the hotel. Having been blessed with reasonable access to the internet at our lodging, I sat down for a moment to set up a download I wanted to grab for the next week. When you’re abroad, you take advantage of the internet every chance you get because you never know when you’ll have it next. So far, I’ve been very lucky. I chatted up a friend for a few minutes on Trillian and went through my email and facebook updates. I did see a very worrisome status update, one in a series of worrisome ones actually, but wasn’t really sure it pertained to me at all so I left it for after dinner. My family and I wandered around time for some time before eventually finding a little Chinese place with a very sweet waitress. Can you believe this gal works eight hours a day seven days a week?!? Geez. After partaking of some decent vegetable chow mein, mixed vegetables and pleasant dinner conversation, we set out to stroll around the town a bit more. It’s a blessing to be able to enjoy time with one’s family like this and I’m grateful for the opportunity. Life moves so quickly that we often forget what’s really important. Somehow, the evening slipped away and hours passed by just enjoying the town.

Oh! There was one entertaining little incident I thought I’d mention. As a gringo and something of an anomaly in the area, it’s not all that uncommon to get curious glances in your direction. Walking by a flower store, there was a truly beautiful little girl of maybe sixteen years old who did not take her eyes off me once the entire time I was walking by. She stared so intently with such a smile that I apparently actually blushed! Eep. That’s not very good for my image. Still, I thought it was very sweet and it put me into a really good mood until I sat back down to my computer later that evening...

I finally got back to my room and just fell on the bed for a few hours. Nap time. I woke up to check my download only to find I was down by a couple of facebook friends and apparently blocked from viewing a certain profile. I couldn’t figure that one out for a few minutes before it dawned on me that I had really pissed off someone somehow? Hmmm... apparently, that status update was about me. Do y’all understand people? It seems I truly don’t.

So with a very heavy heart, I’ll wrap this up here. Hopefully my next entry won’t end on such a down note.

Geckos & Gringos [Mexico, Pt. 2]

Geckos rock. Geckos rock my freakin’ socks off.



Ever seen these little guys around your place? Well, probably not. They’re more accustomed to warm climates like Central America and the Caribbean. Crawling and climbing at times but mostly sitting there, Geckos are a welcome sight in most houses. Why? Because they eat those pesky things we don’t like so much… especially mosquitoes! Over the past few days, I’ve seen more than a few of each. I’m always happy to share my quarters with one of my leathery lizard brothers. Damn mosquitoes...

Yesterday, we found ourselves deeper into the true country and thankfully farther away from the tourist hangouts. We’re staying in Chetumal, the capitol of the Quintana Roo and there’s nary a gringo to be seen… well, outside of yours truly, of course! With its population of around 135,000 people and its well-populated streets, I think we spotted two other people of obvious European ancestry and two of Asian descent. Amateur census taking aside, it’s been a long day. We got started fairly early in the morning although I had been up since around 3:30am or so. After that lovely night’s sleep, a six hour car ride seemed just the ticket to perk us up. Along the highway, it’s amazing to see all of the condos, time-shares and resort properties they are building here. Truly, there is a sucker born every minute and I almost wish I could see who they find to fill in those first two property categories.

Tulum. Since I figure I don’t get quite enough religion at home, it made sense to stop by the ruins of a pre-Columbian Mayan city dedicated to the worship of the Descending God. That makes sense, right? Er… no? Oh, well. Let’s just say it was there so it had to be seen. Having seen so many historic ruins in various places here and there, I’ll just say that I’m ruined for visiting ruins. Get it? “ruined for..” Okay, you do better! sigh. Anyway, I’m told by others that they are quite impressed and I should have been astounded and gazing in awe rather than flirting with visiting Italian girls. Wait, what? Just practicing. Don’t worry. No smooching or hanky panky. I’m not that callous as I’m not totally over my past relationship. Actually I should mention that it feels so different to be flirting in such an openly insincere and superficial manner after having spent the past six weeks being so genuine and honest in my compliments. Funny enough, guess which one works better? Sincerity is for chumps. No, hopefully not. Just still disappointed. Oh, and the ruins. The ruins were once nice things that fell apart built by nice people who are now dead. How’s that for deep historical insight? And people say I’m culturally insensitive…

Chetumal. There’s something seemingly ever-present in the air of some cities. A slightly choking taste of gasoline, dust and heat. Having found a great lunch near Tulum, we were hoping to do the same in the capitol. What constitutes a great lunch for a vegetarian in Mexico? Beans and corn in all their glorious forms. In this instance, I was delighted to have three different forms of legume-y greatness including whole and two types of fried (sin grasa de animales por supuesto!) and a whole stack of tortillas along with a plate of hopefully well washed veggies. After looking around the city for a while and enjoying the sights and scents, we finally settled on a respectable looking Italian place. You know it’s fine Italian cuisine when pizza is the most advertised part of their menu. At any rate, I did end up ordering a pizza with no cheese and tons of vegetables and they didn’t even seem to regard it as a strange request. “Yo quisiera algo un poco raro. Quisiera una pizza vegetariana SIN queso. NUNCA queso. Solamente el pan, la salsa de tomate y los verduras. Nunca queso. Gracias.” It took a little while for our food but when they did finally bring it out, it was quite good and they got it just right. I think the funniest part of evening was the dinner mints they gave us at the end of the meal.

The writing on the packaging of my mint said, “Cada día que amanece el número de tontos crece.” WHOAH! What? Okay, now my Spanish may have just gotten horrible from a lack of practice but I do believe that translates as “Each day the sun dawns, the number of stupid people grows.” Wow! Talk about hostile. My mom’s mint wasn’t much better. It said, “La desgracia a la puerta vela, y en primera ocasión se cuela.” I’ll let y’all translate that one.

That’s about all I have time to type this morning. We’re heading across the border to Belize in a few hours. As a bit of trivia, Belize is the only country in Central America where English is an official language.

¡Hasta luego!